Slow as F$!k

When I was in 9th grade, I joined the freshman girls' basketball team. Despite being quick and passionate, I was short and most likely never going to excel. My basketball coach, who also happened to be the track coach, suggested I take up running. This marked the start of my running "career," which spanned all three high school seasons - cross country, winter track, and spring track. Running became a part of my life and my identity. At some point, cycling took the forefront, and running simmered in the background but I still considered myself a runner, even during long periods without a single jog.

In 2017,  I completed a half ironman, but afterwards, I abruptly stopped running and, for the first time in my adult life, I stopped seeing myself as a runner. It felt out of reach to me - almost impossible that I could start again. Running felt daunting.

About a month ago, I stumbled upon a video on TikTok. A young woman talked about her 'Slow as F$!k' running approach. The concept instantly resonated with me. And just like that, I dusted off my old running shoes and set out to run 'Slow as F$!k.' It was a liberating mix of jogging and walking, unmarred by the pressures of distance or pace. No data.  Just fresh air and the joy of moving my body.

This Slow as F$!k perspective has been transformative. My old belief that running has to be fast, far, or competitive has lost its hold over me. Since this epiphany, I've run only a few times, but I am loving being out there again. Of course, I have had the thought that I should train for a marathon and just go at this slow as f$!k pace. So clearly that urge to set ambitious goals still lurks just beneath the surface. So far, however, I have been able to consciously steer away from that mindset. For now, I am simply enjoying being a runner again.

My take away?

It wasn’t my body holding me back but rather my mind(set). 

And it has me thinking, what else would be available to me with a change in perspective?