Do You Still Remember?

While on a family vacation when we were young kids, my mom and my sister took a late night walk. The moon and stars were bright, the weather was perfect - it was magical.  It was so special in fact, that they decided to remember that moment forever. From that point on, all they had to say to each other was Do You Still Remember and the other knew exactly what she was referring to. It was meant to be something just between the two of them –a sweet secret of sorts - but the magic of it was so great that the rest of our family not only found out about it but also wanted in on it. Over the course of our childhood, we developed our own Do You Still Remember moments with our mom as well as with each other. 

There is no formula for choosing a Do You Still Remember. It’s simply a moment in time that holds a sense of belonging. And I believe that what makes it so important is not how remarkable the specific moment is, but rather the simple act of deciding to remember it.

We all have horrible moments in our lives that are seared into our brains forever; the death of a loved one, the diagnosis of an illness, a president being shot or elected…. We can recall those moments and the emotions associated with them with such clarity. What I love about Do You Still Remember is that with just a tiny bit of intentionality, we are able to hold onto good moments with the same intensity as the really bad ones.

My Do You Still Remember with my sister was a moment when we were laughing so hard, we could barely speak. To this day when I think of it, I get the same rush of emotions that I had 35 years ago. The Do You Still Remember with my brother is completely different. Sitting around the dinner table as a family, we were talking about Do You Still Remember. My older brother and I realized that we didn’t have one with each other. So, the two of us got up from dinner, and walked into our dining room to discuss. We decided that that very moment standing in the dining room would be our moment. The funny thing is, that even though it was so contrived, I still get that same shine when I think of it. The feeling that everything is just right in the world – the feeling of love and belonging.

So, what’s the take-away? We don’t get to choose our dreadful moments. But we do get to hold onto the seemingly insignificant and fleeting moments of happiness and contentment and expand them. We get to choose to remember the good.

I am forever grateful to my mom for this gift – thanks mom!